To be diplomatic rather than point fingers and cry foul, I would simply make a point of mentioning "I may have gotten <pest> from <person X> due to the fact he's the last person I got corals from..."
But as Gresham mentioned, many pests may already be in our tanks, it's just something is keeping them under control to the point where we don't notice them. Hell I thought one particular person I got a piece of digitata from was the reason I got monti-eating nudis (MEN?) but I realized it might not be from him simply because the frag I got was a top portion (ok not a guarantee), I did dip it (again not a guarantee), but someone mentioned a frag had MEN some time back, however I kind of dismissed it as possible cross contamination with other things that were being dipped by him, why? Because I didn't see any evidence of them in my tank, then one day WAMMO I noticed a little too much "tissue recession" and at night armed with a light and a syringe to suck out something I saw... confirmed what I thought, I had them.
Also now have an outbreak of planera, first thought, "god damn rodactis I picked up on my last pick and just tossed in my softy tank... which BAR member was that... (it was a bar donation)..." (also I forgot that I saw them prior to the frag swap
) then I noticed them in my sunlit-frag tank which is strange because it's not connected to my softie tank at all... and wondered how the hell did it get there... everything was providone dipped before going in there... then I saw it.. a lone mushroom, one that I must have missed when packing up frags, the bunch that I just tossed in the frag tank after fragging to await the morning... So yeah anyone who snatched those red/green fuzzy mushrooms from me, if you didn't dip, there's a chance you'll see some red-planera going through your tank (easy enough to deal with with flat-worm exit though).
The whole point is we may have pests in our tank that are being controlled then something happens, a predator gets removed (how many people have given away 6-lines recently?), or you overfeed one too many times to allow enough food to get a huge population spike so they do become viewable, or one finally manages to find the "mother load" of coral food on a particular rock because of the close proximity of many types of it's food (i.e. montipora, or acropora, etc). So moral of the long winded story? Mention the person's name, but do so in a diplomatic way, why? because someone might have the pests as well for a long time and think nothing is wrong with it then pass them on. Some might not even put frags into a frag swap if they thought there was an infestation of something, hell I contemplated not putting in any softies, but then I saw how easily they died with a providone dip, and decided that it's up to people to assume everything they have is potentially infected.
I still am hoping I don't have AEFW in my tank, and that the tissue recession is from some other cause, but I'm still going to be on the look out, who knows if I lose a ton of stuff, I might just give up the hobby, or go a different route, like softies/lps only with some not-so-sps friendly fish or something where I don't have to spend a bank on lighting.